You said you'd never break up with me
by Emotionality
Summary: What happened between Rachel and Finn in 2x09? This is my own world of what happens next! Finchel. Is it a happy ending? Or a bad ending?  Reviews please! WARNING! Contains mild use of strong language.
1. The Break Up

**You said you'd never break up with me**

**I really hated the episode. If Finchel are forever broken up. I quit watching glee! I only watch it just for them! STRICTLY NO PUCKLEBERRY FANS PLEASE. Don't watch us Finchel fans suffer. Oh and please review after reading.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own glee. Although if I was then I would fire Mark Salling and I would hang around with Lea Michele and Cory Monteith. P.S I hate Taylor Swift.**

**Chapter One: The Break Up.**

"I thought you'd never make me feel this way" _He said angrily..._

Finn's eyes were full of anger and sadness. I started to cry, I had let the anger out of me and tears started to fall from my eyes that were once full of joy and love. I stood there in shame, I felt guilt running over me. I covered my face with my hands, my hands that were once warm and always had a hand to hold onto. But they were lonely and they hid my face to cover the shame and the weakness that showed on my face. How could I be so selfish? He broke up with me again. I thought he would enver break up with me again. And then that's when it hit me. The cold ice running down my clothes, staining them like _he_ stained me. I didn't care who threw the slushie at me. I took my shaking hands that revealed my sad face and was now covered with blueberry slushie. I didn't care if people started to laugh at me, I didn't care if it was Santana who threw the slushie at me, I didn't care what I looked like with the slushie all over me. But what I did care about... _was that he stood there doing nothing... he watched me and I could feel what he was thinking; Maybe I do deserve this..._ I felt a warm hand that gripped my shoulder that showed that someone actually cared. I looked into their eyes. It was Kurt... What was he doing here? Why is he here knowing that Karofsky was here? "Come on Rachel, follow me". I followed him into the female's bathroom that was full of cheerios and they all turned around and laughed. They laughed as if was they were going to die. They laughed through my mind, their laughs echoed. I realised one of the girls there, she had blonde hair and blue eyes, the girl who used to be with _him._ The girl who used to make my life a living hell. Quinn. She looked at me with sympathy but at the same time she was laughing aswell. I always thought that we were friends, but she had changed. She had changed when she got her head cheerleader position back. Kurt looked at me and tried to give me a smile but it didn't comfort me, I couldn't handle it. I couldn't handle this. So I ran to the safest place I could find. The Choir Room. I scanned everywhere to see if anyone was in there, no one was there. I entered the room slowly and steadily making sure that I didn't fall since my eyes were quite blurry because of the tears that had fallen. I sat on the piano stool as I cried there until the slushie had dried on my face and my clothes. I was playing with the piano until I realised that my hands were on auto pilot and started to play a familiar song. I smiled a little knowing this was the right song that expressed myself right now.

_**I always needed time on my own**_

_**I never thought I'd need you there when I cry**_

_**And the days feel like years when I'm alone**_

I started to sing the song with the most passion I had. I miss Finn... You stupid, selfish girl! Why did you ever kiss Puck? I started to cry again but I still managed to pour all my heart out to the song. Then a flashback came in and I saw Finn breaking up with me to find his 'inner rockstar', I knew what he meant by his 'inner rockstar', he meant he didn't want to lose his popularity because he was so embarrased to be seen with a sad loser like me. Maybe that is what I am. I looked down at the necklace that he once gave me, it made me smile just to have that nice cosy memory with him...

_**When you walk away I count the steps that you take**_

_**Do you see how much I need you right now?**_

I started to remember that look on his face. I started to remember what he said after I said that _he promised that he wouldn't break up with me_. He lied. He lied once again. I don't know how many chances I can give him, but this time it was partly my fault... Why are you a loser Rachel?

_**When you're gone**_

_**The pieces of my heart are missing you**_

_**When you're gone**_

_**The face I came to know is missing too**_

_**When you're gone**_

_**The words I need to hear to always get me through**_

_**The day and make it ok**_

_**I miss you...**_

I miss his smile whenever he looked at me. That smile when we sang 'Marry You' in the wedding... It looked like he meant it. I continued crying and singing throughout the song. Then I remembered all the times he said those three words. _'I love you': Regionals... The wedding... And... Before we broke up. _I never once said it to him. You're a jerk Rach, you're also a slut.

_**I've never felt this way before**_

_**Everything that I do reminds me of you**_

_**And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor**_

_**And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do**_

He has changed my life so much. I felt these pair of eyes watching me but I didn't care so I ignored it and kept playing. What was my life like before Finn? I couldn't remember. How do I erase him from my memory? I couldn't... He was a massive turning point in my life... Before Finn, life didn't exist then.

_**We were made for each other**_

_**Out here forever**_

_**I know we were, yeah**_

_**And all I ever wanted was for you to know**_

_**Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul**_

_**I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah**_

Why hasn't he come back running to me yet? I need him. I love him. I don't think he doesn't love me anymore... This could be the end of our story... I tried to think postive but all these negative thoughts are invading it. Maybe I should just quit everything and focus on my classes. Quit glee club. Quit ballet classes. Quit trying so hard to make friends. Quit trying too hand on your work. I am a failure after all... I ruin everyone's lives. Maybe this is why Shelby abandoned me, maybe this is why Jesse broke up with me... BECAUSE IM A SELFISH BITCH! I realised that I said that too loud. And I cursed! I cursed for the first time in this damn jewish life. And when I stopped playing because of the pressure, I stopped and just sat there crying repeatedly. A big hand that was soft came in contact with my shoulder. I didn't see who it was, I just started to cry at their shoulder, it was buff. I just cried on their shoulder until I heard the bell rang which signified that it was time for glee club. I examined at the person's face. It was Puck. "Puck, what are you doing here?".

"Look I'm sorry Rachel, it's actually my fault too..." Suddenly a tall figured man came in the room and when he saw me hugging Puck, he suddenly clenched his fists and had a hurted expression on his face. "Finn! It's not what you think! Please Finn I love you!" I stood up and ran to Finn to embrace him but I was unwelcomed and pushed me down to the floor. I was shock. Hurt. Heart Broken. This was something I haven't experienced before. The whole world seemed to be against me. Salty liquid started to fill my eyes and it was stinging my eyes which added more pain in me. The glee clubbers started to enter the room and stared at me with devastation. "Rachel you broke my heart. I don't think I can ever forgive you. Just stay away from me ok?" His voice was deep and different. It felt like it hurted more more than just physically hurting me. Santana then came into the room and walked over to Finn with a huge smirk on her face and held Finn's hand who gladly accepted. _So... He moved on that quickly?_ "So you and Santana..." I stopped and gulped, feeling the lump in my throat that seemed to be growing, "...Are together now?" I closed my eyes hoping that he wouldn't say those exact words which would pain me. "Yeah we are you annoying rat!" Santana stated with a nasty tone in her voice. The humiliating feeling was returning again, this time the whole school seemed to be watching the whole rant in the choir room. I made eye contact with his eyes and it felt like a whole new world. There was no warmth or home in there for me anymore.

**Author's note: I really hate the writers who made Rachel and Finn not together anymore. It should be against the law. I wanna kill Ryan Murphy! I cried when I saw the episode! And did everyone see Lea Michele and Mark Salling's tweets on twitter? Eugh. STRICTLY NO PUCKLEBERRY. I MEAN NO PUCKLEBERRY. I WILL KILL ALL PUCKLEBERRIES. WHO IS WITH ME :) REVIEWS PLEASE**

**P.S I will update my other story, 'We Made Promises', tomorrow or the next day.**


	2. Colourless Days

**Author's Note****: Glee was on X Factor on Sunday! I was so amazed. It's beyond amazing. Cory Monteith was so cute :) And Lea was so pretty! They wore the same clothes from regionals :D. Sorry for not updating. For some reason I can't update on my other story, I shall report it! Anyways heres chapter 2.**

**Disclaimer: I dont own Glee. All rights goes to Ryan Murphy. P.S I can't believe I'm not seeing them in London! They're doing a European Tour.**

Heavy hours passed by, depressing days passed by. Will it soon be miserable months pass by? Why hasn't _he _called me? Or text? Or even talk to me? Why? I talk to myself and lay there, in bed every night looking at the stuff from my locker. The necklace that _he_ gave me that said _'Finn'_, our his and her's calendar, and the... The jacket _he_ gave me when we done the Britney numbers. I could smell _him _everywhere in the room, _his_ scent giving his presence as an illusion, the sweet moisture of _his_ cologne. I missed _him_. I missed _him_ truly. The thought of christmas coming up. Looks like I will be alone this christmas. I even planned my christmas holidays. I would kiss _him _under a mistletoe. I would give_ him _a photo album which has pictures of me and_ him_. Even though I am a jew, I would cook for _him_ and go to_ his _house for christmas dinner. But it will never exist. It will never, ever exist. The thought was just unrealistic. But it was a dream. A dream like any other dream. I wrapped my legs with my arms and took the jacket out of the box. I hugged it tightly as my tears started tp rain on the jacket, I would sniff it every now and again just to get that feeling. That tingly feeling that would always comfort my lungs, it would take my breathe away. I close my eyes and visualize _him _in my head._ His _cute smile, _his _bright eyes, _his _messy hair. That was my world. A world where_ he _would smile at me, where _he_ cared about me, where _he_ made me feel special. But that world was extinct. It was as if nothing was there. Empty. I opened my eyes that was blurred, my eyes went into the box and the calendar caught my eyes. I examined it and saw a circle on today's date. It was _his_ birthday. Was I meant to give _him_ a present? What would be the appropriate present? No. I don't even think were friends. So why bother? I sighed and decided to look at the whole thing for the last time. I wanted to keep it. I seriously did. But everytime I looked at it, it reminded me of _him_. It would remind me of the happy days, but then it would lead to the colourless days. Where everything just went dark. It was just pain that you could feel. Flashbacks would haunt you at night time and before you know it, you would drift off to sleep crying and nightmares would catch you. My daddies get worried everynight as I screamed like I was being murdered. I would scream till there was no air left in my lungs. I picked up my phone and texted Kurt to meet me at my locker before he went to Dalton and he replied after 4 minutes with only 'ok'. No kisses. Not even a 'how are you?' or 'what are you doing during the happy holidays?'. Maybe I had no real friends. Maybe it was just fake and pretend. I had no one to talk to. I was alone. Again. It was 7.30 AM in the morning, I didn't take a shower. I didn't wear make up. I didnt even bother wearing my woolly jumper or my knee high socks or my cute skirts. I just didn't care. I wore my grey sweatpants, white vest and my black zipped jacket. I then went to school, I wasn't taking any notice of where I was going, I was just walking. That was normal right? But then of all the people that I could have bumped to. It had to be _him. Finn_. Why _him? _I dropped all _his_ stuff that was scattered everywhere on the floor from the box and fell down. Everyone got my attention and there was an awkwardness between us. So I decided to finish the awkwardness and started to pick up the things that_ he _gave me. I stored all the tears that crept from the corner of my eyes and just kept doing what I did. But a tear had disobeyed and I wanted to do was just to disappear. Well literally, everyone just wanted me to disappear right? So I just pushed the box in his arms and ran. I ran like a cheetah. I just wanted to run as far as I can away from him, from the glee club, from the school, from my house, from this city. But when you run too fast and get so caught up in your thoughts, you look at the side and your eyes widen. You scream first then boom. You get hit by a double-decker bus.

*Glee!*

"Rachie! Ray-ray! Darling! Rachel wake up! It was just a nightmare" I opened my eyes and I noticed that I was panting and sweating, my eyes were full of tears. I looked at the man in front of me and realised that it was my dad. "Rachel are you okay? Do you want to talk about it? Did he hurt you bad?" I really wanted to, I wanted to talk to somebody. Anybody. But it would just rip my heart out. I started to whimper and cry on my dad's shoulder. "It's okay dad... It's nothing really. I promise". Promise. That word made me want to puke. Promise. A word that i don't have faith anymore. Promise. A promise that _he _broke. A promise that shot me. A promise that was betrayed. I continued to sob and pour all my sadness on my dad's shoulder. "Okay darling.. But just remember, we are always here for you". My dad started to pat my back which soothed my emotions. My eyes started to fall and soonly after I fell asleep.

*Glee!*

The sunlight was hitting my face, it had hurted my red, puffy eyes so I rubbed my cold, sad eyes. I looked around my bedroom and once my eyes focused on my wardrobe. It was time for a new me. So I jumped out of my bed and started to get changed into my black skinny jeans, plain white top and my black leather jacket. I then wore my black military shoes and took my purse and my phone. It was time to change and to move on. I needed to listen to other music, something that wasn't totally me. I got in my little pink car and drove to the music store. Then a rush of memories came;One was when I met Jesse for the first time and we sang 'Hello', suddenly words started to echo through my head... "...I'm not just some guy who you met at the music store you can just blow off. I dont give up that easy...". Finn. As I parked next to the music store my phone rang. It was Kurt. "Hello?" I answered my phone. "Rach what happened? You and Finn have broken up? How come I didn-" I interupted him because I knew that name meant nothing to me anymore. Or atleast I thought that it didn't mean anything to me anymore. "Kurt it's okay, ask Finn not me. Okay? Bye". I hung up, closed my phone and sighed. That was rude but I couldn't take it. After a few minutesI opened the door and walked of to the music store not to mention that I didn't care if someone stole it. I entered the music store and saw a paper that said 'Classic Rock' and it reminded me of the song 'One'. Then I remembered me and Finn singing it. The look in his eyes, the things he helped me get through when I had laryngitis. When he sang 'Jesse's Girl'. No. Bad idea to go to classic rock. I walked pass each section and found Katy Perry's song, 'Firework'. This song meant alot to me, it taught me things, there was a meaning behind it. I started singing where there was many people.

_**Do you ever feel like a plastic bag,  
**_ _**Drifting through the wind, wanting to start again?**_

I felt worthless, maybe I am worthless because I have messed things up badly. As in messed things up BIG time, with ne and... him. I didn't dare to say his name because his name just hurts me too much. It burnt me. And I wish I could take all things that I have done wrong. I regretted it. I regret kissing Puck. I regret argueing with... him. I regret it. All of it. The thing I hated the most was that I loved him. Way too much.

_**Do you ever feel already buried deep?  
**_ _**Six feet under screams, but no one seems to hear a thing**_

Yeah so he broke my heart, like three times: One is when I found out that Quinn was pregnant with him but then I found out that it wasn't actually his, the other one is when he dated Santana and Brittany and the last one is... Well the final break up. And the worst thing is that everyone seems to be against me, no one wants to hear my annoying problems even though I try to not be annoying. Rachel what are you talking about? Stop thinking like that! But still... He left a deep cut in me. He scarred me. It kills not to see him smile at me.

_**Do you know that there's still a chance for you?  
Cause there's a spark in you**_  
Will there be any more chances of me and him? Anymore of me and him laughing together? I miss him. i really can't think of anything other else than him. Maybe I should just try again? But what if he rejects you again? What if he hurts you again? Will he be there if you fall? Will he disappoint you again?

_**You don't have to feel like a waste of space  
You're original, cannot be replaced**_

What if I am a waste of space and time? Everyone in glee club hates me. They all want me to quit glee club so they can have the solos that I deserve. But after all... I am replaceable aren't I?_**  
**_You just gotta ignite the light, and let it shine  
Just own the night like the Fourth of July

_** Cause baby, you're a firework  
Come on, show 'em what you're worth  
Make 'em go "ah, ah, ah!"  
As you shoot across the sky-y-y  
Baby, you're a firework  
Come on, let your colors burst  
Make 'em go "ah, ah, ah!"  
You're gonna leave 'em all in awe, awe, awe  
Boom, boom, boom  
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon  
It's always been inside of you, you, you  
And now it's time to let it through  
Cause baby, you're a firework  
Come on, show 'em what you're worth  
Make 'em go "ah, ah, ah!"  
As you shoot across the sky-y-y  
Baby, you're a firework  
Come on, let your colors burst  
Make 'em go "ah, ah, ah!"  
You're gonna leave 'em all in awe, awe, awe  
Boom, boom, boom  
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon  
Boom, boom, boom  
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon**_

Rach, you have to stop thinking like this. You're better than all of them. You will be a star. You have to move on. Because once you are the star, they will be amazed. They'll be saying sorry while you're on the stafe _alone, _people applausing. Rachel think positive! I'm going to show them that I can move on!

After finishing the song, people started to clap and I started to flash red on my face. I've never sang alone by myself in public. I should really get used to it though, because this is the beginning of a new age in Rachel Berry's life! i was about to exit the store when I saw a familiar man reading a show choir best songs book. An idea entered my mind and I knew that this was a right decision.

"Jesse? It's me. I want to join Vocal Adrenaline".

**Author's Note:**** Was that good? I was trying to improvise as I went along. Finchel all the way! Can't wait for tomorrow's episode! I hope Finchel are together again! :( still depressed. Please Review :)!**


End file.
